I feel vain whenever I write in this blog and reread it days later. I know it's a way of letting all of my thoughts and emotions out... but am I really this self-centered? I mean, who wants to read about this crap that goes on in my head? I guess I'm also being somewhat of a hypocrite writing about how vain I am when in reality writing about how vain you really are is just an act of being... vain. Blah blah yadda yadda yadda. I've never said 'vain' so many times before!

I've realized lately that I'm a doormat. I let people walk all over me. I do whatever they want, I make dinners, don't express how I really feel, avoid controversy at all costs. Especially towards my new roommates. I go out of my fucking way to drive them places, help them out, make dinner for them.. and it's still just the 3 of them... I generally feel used. I have a hard time standing up for myself when it comes to stuff like this... if you even consider that standing up for yourself.

I feel like a failure. I need to step up everything in my life..